Turning "I can't" into "I can"

I have an elderly neighbor who likes to tell me "You can't". You can't fix that, you can't lift this, you can't solve that. For years, I've responded the same way. "I'm smarter than you think" or "I'm stronger than you realize". Every time she's said "You can't", I've quite handily conquered the challenge.

However, if there came a time when she said "You can't" and I actually had a problem doing whatever it was, I would find a way to do it. I'm determined and pride myself on finding solutions. I'd find a way if only because she said I couldn't.

Cheerleaders in our lives are important. People who support us, give us compliments, and inflate our egos. However, naysayers can be just as motivating. The desire to prove someone wrong can be just as powerful as the desire to make someone proud.

If you think you can't, you're probably right. But, if someone else thinks you can't, release your inner Hulk and show that person what you're made of. Success is even sweeter when you accomplish what others thought impossible.

Now, go seize the day...

The pitfalls of cussing in the workplace

Profanity in the office is unprofessional. It's lowbrow and uncouth. Educated people shouldn't resort to foul language to communicate their unhappiness or frustration. There's a whole world of words out there that don't escalate arguments or take conversations in a volatile direction.

For the last six days straight, the web has been buzzing over the PR agency vice president who called a blogger an effing bee in an email (I've cleaned it up, but the guy used the real f word and b word). If you don't know the story, check it out on PR Daily, Gawker, or Business Insider. In short, his agency made a silly and untargeted pitch to the blogger, the blogger sent a snarky response, the agency rep said they'd steer advertising opportunities away from the site, and then the VP accidentally hit reply all and called the blogger an f***ing b***h (again, the asterisks are mine; he wrote the actual words). Needless to say, the blogger unleashed social media Armageddon on the company and the backlash against the agency has been mind blowing.

Industry publications have latched on to this story, calling out the veep and using the exchange as an example of how not to engage with bloggers. However, let's look at it another way. What if the guy hadn't cussed? Suppose he had said any one of the following things instead:

• "My gosh! Her response was unpleasant and unnecessary!"
• "Let's be sure to never pitch that woman again!"
• "Wow. That was a little over the top."
• "Onward and upward, troops. You can't win them all!"

Instead, he wrote, "What a f***ing b***h!"

These four little words have turned this guy's world upside down. He's deleted his Twitter account (probably to avoid hostile tweets) and been lambasted throughout the industry. If he had shown his displeasure with the woman and the situation without resorting to profanity, I honestly think this would have played out differently. There's just something about those two words in particular that can blow a disagreement into a full-fledged battle.

Am I being naive? Perhaps a little too wholesome?

Does cussing not matter in today's world?

The power of words

 

“Words—so innocent and powerless as they are, as standing in a dictionary, how potent for good and evil they become in the hands of one who knows how to combine them.”

I love the dictionary. The thesaurus is a close second. And, of course I have some great quote books. Words are a marvelous gift and vocabulary is so much darn fun! Nothing makes me more giddy than a well-written sentence or a clever retort. Yes, words are wonderful.

One of the most important things about words is the power they hold. They can inspire, belittle, motivate, or alienate. Well-chosen words can move you to make an unnecessary purchase or save for a rainy day. They can shape your mood so you feel good or bad. They can impact whether your business runs in the black or the red.

Words. Just 26 letters that, when put together in assorted ways, can start wars, create opportunities, break hearts, or change lives.

How much thought do you put into your word choice? Do you make the most of every letter, every syllable, every sentence? Do you waste your words? Miss opportunities? Or, do you embrace the power of each and every verbal or written communication? Every thing you say, type, or scribble brings with it the chance for success.

Are you using your words to make things better? To create happiness? To inspire positive change? If not, why?

*WORD NERD BONUS: If you like words as much as I do, you might have fun with this quiz. You have 12 minutes to guess the top 100 words in the English language. Click HERE to get started. Good luck!