Google+ is destroying 1-on-1 communication

Some of the most important people in my life today are folks who were strangers to me before Twitter. I've nurtured and developed countless personal friendships and valuable business contacts thanks to the one-on-one interaction that Twitter provides. I use the site to establish real relationships.

Send me a tweet? I answer. I send someone a tweet? They respond. Conversation. How beautiful is that?

Enter Google+.

Although I think this new platform has promise, it's to communication what mold is to bread. Just like Facebook, Google+ utilizes threads. Someone asks a question and lots of people can respond. On Google+, up to 500 comments can be logged. I've seen several posts meet this cap, and others come close. When you comment, you're nothing special. You're one in a long thread of folks. I don't want to be one in a sea of comments. I want to be heard. Don't you?

On Twitter, if you send someone a tweet and he doesn't respond, it's the equivalent of him sticking his fingers in his ears while you're talking to him in person. Rude, right? On Google+, however, a great number of users are getting intimate with their ear wax. "Engage with me, but I'm going to be selective about who I respond to!"

Unfortunately, based on the behaviors I'm seeing on Google+, many people are enjoying collecting comments, but mostly just responding to their "real friends". It's this kind of lopsided interaction that prevents people from creating meaningful relationships and having satisfying one-on-one dialogue. (Of course, this practice may vary based on the number of people who chime in and that person's style when it comes to social networking.) The beauty of Twitter is that it knocked down walls, giving us greater access to people--even important ones. Google+ is building back up those walls, denying many people the courtesy of a direct response. Shutting down meaningful communication and, in some cases, making people groupies instead of equals.

If you have the desire to know me, connect with me on Twitter. Send me a tweet and I'll answer you. Strike up a conversation with me and I'll happily engage with you. If I want to know you, I'll do the same. However, I refuse to be one comment in a long thread on Google+. After all, if I take the time to engage with you, shouldn't you engage back?  Threads destroy one-on-one communication, plain and simple.

I'm a person. Talk with me; I talk back. It's called conversation. I'm not in high school anymore and I'm not going to compete in a popularity contest. I won't be one in a crowd, fighting to be heard or acknowledged. I'm worth more than that. Aren't you?

38 comments:

  1. Perhaps you haven't explored G+ enough but it works the same way as twitter.  You can have one on one conversations with strangers and not just add on to the thread.  Just +(name of person you want to msg) and your message and there you go, a one on one convo without anyone else but the two of you seeing it or butting in.  So i don't see what the problem is.

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  2. Interesting post, Amber. I'm still taking it slow with G+, but I hear what you're saying. G+ is like any other platform. If someone is going to take the time to publish a post or update expecting feedback, at least take the time to engage with your readers. Overall, the few comments I've made have been responded to. But there was one comment I made which wasn't responded to and it made me feel like my comment wasn't appreciated. The person is probably busy and we haven't actually spoken before so he could be wondering, "who is this woman?" :) Anyway, I appreciate the fact that you always take the time to engage with your readers and go out of your way to connect. Have a great weekend!

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  3. Hey Joan,

    I've spent about 100 hours on G+ so far, exploring/watching/reading. I don't write about things on a whim that I don't know much about. Yes, you can respond to someone directly by putting a + or an @ in front of their name. Of that, I am aware.

    However, the platform is not the same as Twitter. Granted you can use it that way, you can also use it like Facebook. Furthermore, you can use it an entirely different way. All these platforms come with do-it-yourself rulebooks. To each his own. My commentary is based on the behaviors I'm seeing firsthand.

    As for tagging a person in a conversation thread, TONS of people are turning off those notifications. And, EVERYONE can see those responses, not just the two of you. But, that's not my point.

    My point is Twitter is a great tool for interaction. One on one conversations. Google+ isn't so far, based on what I'm seeing. Perhaps you're only circling people with small audiences and the long thread thing isn't an issue you've experienced. However, I'm seeing it a LOT.

    As for not seeing "what the problem is", it's the fact that Google+ is setting back the masses. Twitter has knocked down walls and increased our access to people--even very important people. Google+ is building back up those walls by enabling folks to engage with a small few instead off the greater masses. That's my problem.

    Will it mean the end of the world? No. Will it set back social networking and access to people? I think it will.
     

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  4. Hey Karen. YES! That's what I'm talking about. You felt ignored. I do, too, when people don't respond back. I think it's human nature.

    And, maybe I set the bar a little high. I make a point to always respond to everyone. On Facebook, on Twitter, here. If someone takes the time to share their opinion with me, I always listen and let them know I heard them. That's just me. But, I try to treat people the way I want to be treated.

    I could have ignored you the first time you reached out to me, saying "Who is this woman?". And you know what, I would have missed out. What a loss that would have been. And, what a loss it is to the person who didn't respond to you.

    Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Karen ;-)

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  5. Hey Joan,

    I've spent about 50 hours on G+ so far, exploring/watching/reading. I don't write about things on a whim that I don't know much about. Yes, you can respond to someone directly by putting a + or an @ in front of their name. Of that, I am aware.

    However, the platform is not the same as Twitter. Granted you can use it that way, you can also use it like Facebook. Furthermore, you can use it an entirely different way. All these platforms come with do-it-yourself rulebooks. To each his own. My commentary is based on the behaviors I'm seeing firsthand.

    As for tagging a person in a conversation thread, TONS of people are turning off those notifications. And, EVERYONE can see those responses, not just the two of you. But, that's not my point.

    My point is Twitter is a great tool for interaction. One on one conversations. Google+ isn't so far, based on what I'm seeing. Perhaps you're only circling people with small audiences and the long thread thing isn't an issue you've experienced. However, I'm seeing it a LOT.

    As for not seeing "what the problem is", it's the fact that Google+ is setting back the masses. Twitter has knocked down walls and increased our access to people--even very important people. Google+ is building back up those walls by enabling folks to engage with a small few instead off the greater masses. That's my problem.

    Will it mean the end of the world? No. Will it set back social networking and access to people? I think it will.

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  6. I had the same observation/frustration.  I have come to the conclusion that Google wants to push point-to-point communication through Gmail and Google Chat. 

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  7. You can talk to me one on one on G+ if you want to too! :) But it was great interacting on Twitter. I find the two tools complimentary. No reason to have to chose, at least at this point.

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  8. Hey Seth. Interesting to know that you're seeing that, too.

    Should be interesting to see how G+ develops. I'm sure it will morph as it goes through beta. And, as was the case with Twitter, users will undoubtedly use the tool the way they want.

    We're in perpetual beta, aren't we? ;-)

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  9. Oh, for sure. I don't think it's a matter of choosing. I know I use Facebook in a much different way than Twitter. I'm sure I'll use G+ differently, too.

    It's just if I want to make meaningful connections and have real conversations, I think I'll stick with Twitter. It's worked well for me and the dynamic there suits my needs. :-)

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  10. One of the things I've noticed is that there is a lot more content, real content, over in G+ so all my twitter connections that already are substantive now have more to talk about in depth. Previously it was only back over at my blog that some of these conversations could be had, but now G+ offers another space.

    Twitter content sharing has become a little bit thin I've noticed. Not only is there the recent move toward Triberr tweets, but also in general I am never sure that anyone has read something they tweet out or RT. On G+ I'm actually discovering that ppl are involved in the topic itself.

    I'll agree. I love the directness of Twitter. It cuts right to the point, but I'm looking forward to how they will feed off each other. My good Twitter friend @67tallchris and I were just thinking about what G+ techniques, practices, habits might help bridge the two. G+ definitely has weaknesses.

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  11. Amber, aloha.  WOW!  I so appreciate your comments in this post.  Though I am on a 30 day challenge with myself to learn Google+ I am not drawn to it.  After reading the points in this post, I am even less inclined to start using it.

    Guess I will learn the basics and stick with twitter conversations.

    Best wishes for a glorious weekend.  See you in the twitter stream.  Aloha.  Janet

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  12. Every platform has a sweet spot. I'm just not inclined to think one-on-one conversation is going to be G+'s forte. Honestly, it seems like a setback to social networking in that respect.

    Thanks for the comment, Janet! And, good luck with the challenge!

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  13. yeah, there is that element of people who want to be social media celebs, and volume is their goal.  

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  14. Maybe that's it. I've always been a quality over quantity kind of gal! :-)

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  15. and not to sound overly cynical, but isn't the goal of providing all this free social media platform service to us really to ultimately gain "traffic" to sell to advertisers?  giving us what we want is the means to an end, not the end in itself, yes?  not that i'm bitter or anything :-) 

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  16. In what way do you find G+ single person sharing very different than let's say Facebook private messaging when it comes to one on one conversation?

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  17. Hmmm. I don't know about that. I think everyone has different goals. Not everyone has a site, or a blog, or a product. I guess it depends upon your social circle (no pun intended!).

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  18. Not sure what you mean by single person sharing. Sure, you can take all conversations private (email, DM, etc.). But if someone has just met me, I doubt they're inclined to devote one on one time with me in a completely private fashion like that.

    With Twitter, however, I can see anything someone says and immediately jump in with a comment or a solution. That's what starts a conversation in my book and introduces you to some great new people.

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  19. Well, you can engage in 1-on-1 interactions on Google+, see:http://geekbeat.tv/how-to-take-advantage-of-google-messaging/

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  20. Hey Nicholas, thanks for your comment. I'm not talking about the ability to tag people in conversations. I'm talking about meeting strangers, engaging with them one-on-one, and then great relationships developing from that.

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  21. This may be the problem I have with Google+ and why I'm actually enjoying Twitter. I couldn't pinpoint why I'm not a huge fan of it, but you nailed it. 

    Before this summer hit, I never dreamed that I would join Twitter, but I decided to check it out to see if it could help me. It has and will continue to do so. I've talked with several amazing people, some of whom sought me out, which is immensely humbling. The problem with Google+ is that it really takes work to make those new connections. With Twitter? It's seamless, easy. I found you because someone Tweeted it. She found you from someone else, in all likelihood. I don't see Google+ being able to do that yet. 

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  22. Hi Shad! Pleasure to meet you!

    Yes, you're so right. It's IS easy to meet new people on Twitter. So effortless, yet so rewarding. It's been a game changer for me and it's my most favorite platform because it has allowed me to meet so many new people and forge relationships with them. I'm so glad you decided to try it out. If you stick with, I have no doubt that it will be a rewarding experience.

    Glad to connect with you! Twitter is amazing that way. Thanks for the tweet and the comment. And, the conversation!

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  23. I think Facebook did the same thing as far as destroying communication. Because it seems all about sharing in a one-way fashion, rather than exchanging ideas and experiences in a meaningful way. And I hate what it's done to having conversations. I have yet to see this happen on Twitter, either, but I do believe it's because I haven't yet figured out how to talk to people on Twitter. I get this sense on Twitter that people only have the patience to hear from you once; any further comments back are just a nuisance for them, and they've already moved on to the next Tweet.

    We need some kind of hybrid between Facebook and Twitter - a virtual coffee shop where friends and acquaintances sit down for at least the time it takes to finish a latte and actually have a conversation.

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  24. Hi Jean! As for the back and forth convos on Twitter, they're there. We just need to connect you with some of your peers. Search for artists to connect with, people who appreciate and enjoy the same things you do! Since you have Boston Terriers, you can also find LOTS of people who love dogs as much as you do. There are loads of dog chats on Twitter where you can connect with others.

    As for the virtual coffee shop idea, I think you should check out a tweetup in your area. Or, host your own! They are great forums to take the briefer online conversations and extend them to in person ones!

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  25. Thank you, Amber! I knew you'd have some good ideas in your pocket. I'll make a stronger effort at finding peeps with my interests. 

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  26. Great! I think that might improve your Twitter experience. ;-)

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  27. I want to know you; you didn't respond to my tweet last night and don't tell me it wasn't funny, because I'm always funny; just ask me.

    All I've done on + so far is accept people as they come; I haven't taken the time to see the conversations, posts, etc and whatever else might be going on. For now I agree with the points you made about twitter and the relationships. I like connecting.............

    That's my story for this weekend and I'm sticking to it. Hope you had a good one.

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  28. Hi Bill. Sometimes your tweets leave me speechless and unable to retort with a witty comeback. :-)

    Everyone is still learning with G+ and I think people's experiences may vary depend on who they're connecting with. I just think there's no substitute for Twitter and as people spend more time on G+, I'm seeing two camps emerge: The I Love Its and the Does Nothing For Me people. Not a lot of in-betweens.

    Being as it's still in beta, I'm sure users will continue to tinker with their usage. I see folks commenting every day that they're redoing circles or having to rethink strategies. What it is today could be very different in six months. Twitter evolved, too. So who knows!

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  29. I have made newly my account on Google + but i found it same as Facebook but a bit different to see other profiles and send friendship invitation (in Google + it can be done if you know the email of someone).

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  30. You know, I am having the opposite reaction to G+. Not that I am into collecting followers, but more people are following me when I comment on a thread, sometimes the original poster replies to me, but more often it is another commenter that I *cough* may have disagreed with.

    I also like the ability to "fork" a conversation -- where someone posts something, another person re-shares with their input and the conversation takes off from there.I get a lot of the ear-wax phenomenon on twitter, and a lot of fluff. In general I am adoring the higher caliber of thoughtful topics on G+ and I will uncircle you if you post more than one cat gif a day!Now off to write my own G+ post ... not the one where I am basically giving away my invites either :D

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  31. That hybrid you want ... it's a hangout in G+ :) or a Huddle.

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  32. Amber, I know this post is older ... but if you have the mobile app have you tried out "Nearby". Currently it seems to include LA from the Valley to Santa Monica, but I have found some interesting people to talk to. Haven't gotten up the nerve to arrange face-to-face meets, but Chris Kim A has.

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  33. I think it also depends on timing (just like twitter) and how often people are on G+. I am probably in the target demo because I have the android app and I am constantly logged into GMail so that little red square follows me everywhere and thereby draws me in. If you are NOT a big user of Google applications, you are less likely to be conditioned to *stay* on G+. I've actually had to wean myself the last few weeks and log out of everything and turn off notification sync if I want to get work done.

    And really, Amber, I am not trying to hijack your post. I just love all things Google!

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  34. Hey Annette! Thanks for chiming in.

    In regard to content, I'm seeing two camps. The very high caliber stuff that you mention and then the low quality stuff comprised on 1990 animated gifs. What's with the gif comeback anyway????

    I know you're a Google fan, so I'm glad you're enjoying it. I'm just not diggin' the groupie aspect. We'll see how the product evolves as it comes out of beta. Time will tell!

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  35. Many features are much different than Facebook. Being able to mute a conversation is a wonderful option that Facebook missed out on on offering big time! Although, sure, some things on G+ are Facebookesque ;-)

    Good luck with your new account!

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  36. Yay! Another Google girl! Let's chat on Google+!  :-)

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