Losing friends: The clash of social media and politics

There are more people using social media today than there were during the last U.S. presidential election in 2008. More people tweeting and posting Facebook status updates about political news stories. More folks sounding off in real time during the presidential debates as they get annoyed, angered, or frustrated. Whether it's about Obama's health care program or Romney's binders full of women, people have an opinion. But, do you need to hear it? Are you starting to dislike your friends and connections because of it? Do you feel like Patricia?

According to a 2012 survey by the Pew Research Center, 40% of social media users say they were surprised by the political views that their friends posted online. Another 20% say they've blocked, unfriended, or hidden someone because the person posted too much political commentary. There's a reason they say you shouldn't discuss politics or religion. People feel strongly and no matter what their opinion, it's about 99.9999% unlikely that they'll unexpectedly embrace the opposite viewpoint.

Personally, I haven't unfriended or unfollowed anyone due to their political tweets or updates. However, I'm not going to lie, there are some people I don't quite see the same anymore. On one hand, can you really be friends with someone if you don't know the "real" them? Are our friendships bound to be more superficial that way? Or are there some things we just shouldn't discuss out in public? Or, only with like-minded individuals?

There's nothing like an election year to help you learn more about your social circle. But, do we have to? Should we just all keep it to ourselves? Or is saying whatever we want and letting the chips (or friends) fall as they may the best approach? Right or wrong, people don't seem to censor themselves much when it comes to social media. We've all been given a soapbox, and most of us use it at one time or another.

Has politics taken its toll on your social stream? Have you alienated someone when you shared your thoughts? Have you lost respect for someone due their support of a certain candidate or proposition? Is social media the place to share political views? Or are we all better off tweeting pictures of our meals and posting updates about our dogs?

Is guest posting for you?

I just came home from a week-long conference in New York, BlogWorld & New Media Expo. Throughout the 200+ sessions from the 175 speakers, one of the recurring themes to help content creators gain exposure was to guest post for other blogs. However, today I read a Q&A with Dino Dogan who calls guest posting "slave labor." Hmmm.

I actually met Dino at the BlogWorld conference and although I had interacted with him online on occasion, I'd never met him in person. He's spunky! And, a really nice guy. Who, by the way, is doing some great things to help up and coming bloggers. But, I have to respectfully disagree with his assessment of guest posting.

If you're a content creator and have the time to do a little extra writing, I highly suggest you start doing guest posts. This is a great way to get your name and ideas in front of a new audience. And, it's also a powerful way to solidify your personal brand.

The more places you write, the richer those Google results will be when someone searches for you online. And, the more popular the site, the higher that guest post will rank in your search results. For instance, I wrote a guest post for Spin Sucks in 2011 called, "7 Ways to Turn Employees into Brand Ambassadors." It got a ton of traffic and even made it onto Spin Sucks' list of Top Ten Guest Posts of 2011, ranking at number seven. That initial article always shows up on the first page of search results when you put my name into Google. I don't know about you, but I think that's pretty neat.

So, is guest posting for you? Here are some resources I've assembled to help you through the process:

A Blogger's Checklist for Guest Posting on Other Blogs
by David Risley

How Guest Posting Can Help Grow Your Blog
by Jeff Goins

10 Places to Find Blogs to Guest Post On
by Kwame Boame

6 Powerful Guest Post Tactics that No One's Talking About
by Tom Ewer

How to Build Links Through Guest Blogging
by Neil Patel


For the record, I think "paid" gigs that offer writers insulting wages are ridiculous and that you should never write an article for $5. However, if you choose to write for free, as is the case with a guest post, because you reap some sort of benefit from it, that's a completely different animal. I know I've done lots of free work over the years, solely because it gave me great exposure. A guest post is no different. Just like anything, you call the shots and as long as you're getting something from it, I say go for it.  

If you're new to the idea of guest posting, do you think this might be for you? If you've guest posted before, what were the benefits? Drawbacks? Any advice for the newbies in the group?

10 things I'm grateful for as a blogger

When I first started my blogging journey, I wondered who in the world would want to read what I have to say. Everyone's busy and I'm just an Average Jane. Who cares about my take on things?

In the beginning, when no one visited, commented, or shared, I told myself to stick with it. Now, years later, I am so happy that I kept plugging away. Today, I'm so incredibly thankful for the great people who have come into my life as a result of this blog and the wonderful opportunities that have presented themselves. As they say, nothing worth having comes easy.

That said, I give you the top 10 things I'm grateful for as blogger:

1. Every person who has ever taken the time to visit my blog. Whether you stayed, left, or came back, I'm thankful you took the time to see what I have to offer.

2. The amazing folks who chime in on the comments. You are the lifeblood of Words Done Write. Your opinions, information, and thoughts further the discussions here and help the conversation evolve.

3. The people who make the effort to share posts. Whether you tweet, like, or stumble the content, your support and promotion are both greatly appreciated. Truly, I mean that.

4. The wonderful subscribers who have added this blog to their readers, email, or followed through Friend Connect. I didn't offer subscriptions when I first started the blog, because I thought no one would be interested. Thank you for proving me wrong.

5. Those who have added me to their blog rolls. I'm honored that you've chosen to link to my site and share my blog with your readers. Your generosity has not gone unnoticed.

6. Fellow bloggers who have riffed on what I've written and linked back to my content. Thank you for reading and giving credit back to the initial post. You have impeccable manners!

7. Visitors who read more than one post. The blog has some oldies but goodies in it, so thank you for digging around through the archived content!

8. The fabulous people who have invited me to speak or guest blog as a result of reading my blog. Thank you for appreciating my insights and quirky style.

9. Those who have been kind enough to recognize my efforts here by writing about me or my blog. I'm honored and humbled.

10. The dedicated readers who stayed with me all the way through the last item on this list. Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your day. I know you have lots of things to do and ways to spend your time. I'm grateful you chose to squeeze me into your otherwise hectic schedules. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

If you're a new blogger, stick with it. Your hard work will eventually pay off, so keep your chin up. If your a veteran blogger, I have no doubt that you're grateful for some of the same things I am (but let me know if I left out something!). If you don't have a blog, thank you so much for being a reader. Those of us who write are nothing without those of you who read! 

Have something to share about your blogging journey? Or, perhaps, your thoughts on reading blogs? Want to share something (anything!) that you're grateful for? Sound off! The stage is yours...

Is your favorite blogger a dirty, rotten thief?

I hate thieves. Being taken advantage of and deceived are things that fail to make me all warm and happy inside. That's why I didn't enjoy getting spammed by a fellow blogger who stole my email address.

I recently commented on someone's blog for the first time. Within a few days I received a spammy promotional pitch from the blogger. I didn't sign up for his email list and I responded to the note, asking him to remove me from his list. His response? By commenting I was bound by his comment policy and agreed to opt into his newsletter. 

I checked out his commenting policy and there was nothing that said by commenting I agreed to opt into mailings. Nothing. Was his response an intentional lie? Hmmm. I emailed him again and once more asked to be removed from his distribution list (since there was no way to remove myself). He said there was no list; it was a plug in. He went on to say I was the first person to ever complain about it.

I asked yet a third time to be removed from his distribution list. He finally said he'd "try" to remove me. Never, not once, apologizing for the situation. Did he really think forcing me to be on his list was winning me over? Is it smart to make someone ask three times to be removed from your list? Is that the way to create meaningful online relationships? As far as I'm concerned, Mr. Spammy McUnethical stole my email address and used it without my permission. Dirty, rotten thief.

Those of us who have blogs are sometimes privy to people's email addresses. Depending on the commenting system and the way a commenter chooses to log in to comment, email addresses may be visible to the blog owner. I've seen many of my commenters' email addresses when they leave comments and, you know what? I don't collect them, sell them, or do anything unethical with them. I delete them. It's someone's private information and I take that seriously. My mama didn't raise a thief.

But, apparently, some bloggers out there are a little fast and loose with your private information. Beware. And, most of all, don't put up with it. If someone betrays your trust, move on. If you condone their lapse in ethics, you enable them to continue. Data theft is no different than property theft.

What do you think? Even if it was in the commenting policy (which is was not), does that mean a person can never ask to be removed from someone's distribution list? Isn't the whole point of having email lists to help strengthen the bond with your community, not alienate it? Is it alright for a blogger to use your personal information any way they choose? Have you ever been the victim of data theft?

Are all creative people just D-list performers?

Credit: Mark Parisi

I recently attended a benefit concert for Stitch the dog (to help Stitch and his family, click HERE). I noshed on bread and fruit and soaked in all the original music by some fantastic local artists. Some were just amazing! Just as good, or better, than the folks you hear on reality TV shows or the radio. I thought to myself, "It must be frustrating to be so talented and never make it big. Poor people. Only a small group of folks will ever be able to enjoy what they have to offer." Then it hit me, "These singers are no different than me!" 

I write on this blog a few times a week and I, too, only reach a small audience (although a wonderfully smart and good looking audience, I might add!). I'd love to make it to the big leagues one day, but even if I don't, I'll continue to write--because that's what I do. I am extremely grateful for the community of readers who support me. I don't take any blog comment, tweet, like, or other nicety for granted!

Each blog post I write is pretty much on par with the gig of any indie artist who plays at a local beer hole. I do what I do and cross my fingers that someone shows up! Neither of us is reaching millions, nor are we household names, but we will continue to be creative in our own ways because that's how we express ourselves.

There are so many wonderfully talented people out there who will never receive the accolades they so rightfully deserve. Whether one's talent is sculpting, writing, picture taking, painting, writing music, drawing, singing, playing an instrument, glass blowing, or some other creative endeavor, only a few folks will be discovered. Even fewer will prosper. But, create they must. They go on, because they're called. Because it's their passion. Because it's who they are.

Am I any different? I can't say that I am. I'm a D-list performer, just like the singers I pitied. Funny, how that reality took awhile to set in. But, I love what I do. And if only a handful of people dig it too, well, that's enough for me.

So, in true beer hole fashion, I'll sign off. This post was dedicated to the readers in the front row. Thanks for coming out today, my friends. Be true to yourselves and express your creativity in whatever way you can. Remember to tip your waitresses and drive home safely.  I'll be here all week...

Buffy the Vampire Slayer made me a lazy blogger

Think, think, think. I'm tired of thinking. Career, family, social media commitments. My mind is always on. Therefore, I've turned to Buffy the Vampire Slayer to save me.

I'll be honest, I've had some personal and professional setbacks lately. It's gotten me down. I'm probably also suffering from a little bit of social media fatigue (lots of people have been blogging about it since the launch of Google+). But, fortunately, I've found a safe haven. Buffy the Vampire Slayer: The Complete Series DVD boxed set.

I've been delighting in turning off my brain in the evening and watching Buffy slay demons and dust vampires. It's helped me unwind and been wonderfully frivolous entertainment. What it hasn't helped is my blogging.

Scott Stratten of Unmarketing fame says don't blog unless you have something amazing to say. On the flip side, content creator extraordinaire Chris Brogan writes more in a week than most of us do in six months. He does this by skipping the time gobblers like television--and Buffy DVDs.

The great thing about our new uber-connected lives is that we're always in the know. The bad part is we never truly get away and unwind. There's no shortage of real life and online commitments nowadays. Heaven forbid you don't update your Facebook status for a week and people think you've died!

I've worked long and hard on this blog and it's not anything I ever intend to stop doing. However, laziness has been known to strike on occasion. Buffy just made it worse.

How do YOU keep yourself from getting lazy? Is it important to have mental breaks from our online responsibilities? Or did Buffy and her quest to fight the forces of darkness just bring out my inner slacker?